“Dat skitto is getting my honey,”  so said my three year old tonight while a mosquito bit him no less than four times while he sat and watched.  He won’t kill any small flying insect because in his mind they all bite or sting.  Better to run screaming, “A Fwy!  A Fwy!”

He is so funny, and sees the world in such a unique way.  When angry with his brother I hear, “You a peanut head!”

I took the boys to Coney Island last week.  (A water park with rides.)  My three year old is such a dare devil.  He didn’t understand the height requirement for the roller coaster and insisted on standing in line.  But when the man with the big stick showed him the line and he was well under it by a foot, my little dare devil puffed up his chest, and cried.

Speaking of crying……..

I purchased an on line mmorph game for my oldest son.  One I can actually stand to watch him play.  Of course after spending $49 on the game and bringing it home and installing it, it didn’t work. 

It seems Netgear wireless routers don’t play well with this particular game.  I worked on it for four hours, downloading upgrades, changing Ethernet cables, and gave up.  I called tech support for the router, and paid $32.50 for a half hour so a guy in India could try to speaky English and tell me how to fix it.  Except it didn’t work, the English or the fix.

As I was talking to him it seemed a skit from Saturday Night Live.  “What did you say?  Huh?  I can’t understand you!  Can you spell it?  I can’t understand your letters either!  SHESH!  Is there anyone there that speaks English better?  No, I said ENGLISH!”

It occurred to me as I was repeating my credit card number for the tenth time…those tech guys are probably Americans.  Heh.  They fake a really bad accent so it takes longer, so they make more money.  Then if you understand their bad accent too much they whisper and mumble.  Maybe they aren’t even techs.  Maybe just some guys sitting around pretending to tell you what to do, knowing you can’t understand a word they say, and will eventually give up.

I’m on to the game.

They got their last $32.50 from me.

So having sunk $82.50 into the game, I went ahead and bought another router today for little more than that phone call.  Which burned my ass.  But it works perfectly now.

Something I don’t understand…we can send a man to the moon, but there is no such thing as an Ethernet splitter?  Yeah I know that is what a router is…heh, but why can’t there be some like the ones for telephone lines?  You know the one you plug into the jack and wala two jacks?  But have an Ethernet splitter on the back of the modem?  OR how about a modem with two Ethernet cable outputs that I don’t have to mortgage the house for? 

And while I’m on it.  Why isn’t cable wireless yet?  I don’t mean wireless once it’s in my home.  I mean wireless, wireless.  It’s retarded that in this day and age we are still dealing with coax cables, heck, cables of any kind.  We should have satellites or something built into our homes that receive and then relay all WIRELESSLY…not one cord!

Speaking of cords……

Can you imagine how much nicer our cities and towns would look if all the electrical and telephone lines were underground?  I lived in states which were starting to adopt this policy and wow, what a huge difference!  Things didn’t look as cluttered and you could actually SEE the sky and trees without a bunch of ugly black cables on crooked wooden or steel poles. 

Or, Wireless electricity…now that would be the future of technology!  Heh.  Pleasing to at least one of the five senses.

Speaking of the senses…..

There was a peculiar rotting smell coming from under my kitchen sink tonight.  Upon investigation I found a leaking rotting bag of potatoes.  How do rotting potatoes leak through not one, not two, but three friggin plastic bags?  And what about potatoes rotting in one short week in an air conditioned house?

I think potatoes were tougher when I was a kid.  I remember keeping a bag of taters in the kitchen by the back door for weeks and weeks.  Even when they started sprouting they never rotted.

Now, after one week……..rot.  Sad. 

Speaking of rotten………….

Last year I went to help out at my son’s elementary.  I sat out in the hall on several occasions waiting for the class to come back from an activity, or waiting for the function to begin.

There was a loud mouthed aggressive teacher in the room across the hall always making a stink.  She kept her door open and every single time I visited the school she was yelling at her class, or speaking in an angry tone.  I never heard a peep from her class.

My son told me she is a fifth grade teacher and she is "really mean."  He was praying all summer he wouldn’t get this teacher.  His odds were one in six.

We got up early Tuesday so we could be at the school as soon as the class lists posted.  His face fell when he saw his name on her class list.  Not just fell, but all the excitement, all the eagerness for school to start, fled and hasn’t been seen since.

My son is quietly anxious.  Meaning his anxiety doesn’t show to any but those who know him well.  When he is really anxious he chews the skin around his nails and down to his first finger joint…not his nails but the skin, ew.  I know he’s stressed about this woman because his fingers are bleeding now, literally.

If she so much as barks at him…….grrrrr.

I’m hoping he ends up liking her.  But right now he is one step away from running scared into the night. Heh.

Speaking of running…..

Heh.  I have to do it right now.

To bed.