April. Wow. The journey from September to April?  It’s been painful, onerous, toilsome, tough, taxing, burdensome, exhausting; pick your adjective.  It has also been educational .  That’s right, I said it! At the risk of becoming one of those people who only ever talks about their latest physical malady, hang tuff, it won’t last long. I started chemotherapy in December; just finished.  (Except for a single agent I get intravenously until ...

My youngest has the best work ethic.  

Warning:  This is a bit of a ramble…doing it very fast….but if you can make it through, would love your feedback! I went to get my wig today. It’s a nice wig, looks just like my old hair, except a little longer. Insurance covers 80% of a “cranial prosthesis,” but once in a lifetime. I went to a Network provider (NP). A NP is someone who signs a contract with my insurance company agreeing to accept payment for whatever amount my insurance company deems w...

Yesterday. In the Chemo Chair next to mine. A child. My son’s age. His mother’s face, oh my god, his mother’s face.  Creases deep enough for an an entire fingertip. Inside. I shattered.  I was strong and steady up until then.  But something died inside me yesterday, shriveled black and stinking in the presence of the child’s pain. And his mother’s. And for the first time I thanked God for my breast cancer.  Thanked God it is me an...

Today I went for the first big Chemo treatment of 6.  This regime involves a cocktail of three chemotherapies:  Taxotere, Carboplatin, and Herceptin (TCH) every three weeks, and I go in once a week for the Herceptin between the big cocktail.  After 18 weeks (barring problems) I go to Herceptin every 3 weeks up to 52 weeks, and start radiation, 7 weeks.  Then Tamoxifen for five years.  Most civilian cancer centers are a little fancier than the one at Wright Patters...

***Photos of Skin-Sparing Mastectomy Below Post-Surgery*** It is true.  I bruise easy, and they tend to last a long time.  In fact, it is fairly normal to keep a bruise for 4-5 weeks.  Remember the bruising from the gross 5-day post-op pictures?  (Visual reminder below…) When my plastic surgeon saw the bruising he told me about this wonderful herb called Arnica Montana (AM).  He encouraged me to take it.  Skeptical, I trudged to GNC, plopped down...

I went to get my boob filled today. Seriously. I bought a Venti Starbucks Skinny Vanilla Latte to fill my belly, then reclined on a table while the good doctor inserted a needle and pumped 100 ml of saline into the expander.  I made him stop at 100 because my pectoral muscle was tweaking.  But now I think he could have gone at least 50 more.  I have 200 ml to go yet, but several months to get there.  Can’t swap expander for gummy bear until I’m done wit...

Five years ago, on JoeUser, I “met” UDig, aka Chris.  I loved his sense of humor, his writing, the way he loved InBloom. Online acquaintance grew into friendship. Yesterday this vibrant, funny, talented young man passed away from health complications. God bless him.  God bless Inbloom. May he rest in peace.     His blog.

***********************************GRAPHIC PHOTOS OF A  POST-MASTECTOMY BREAST BELOW******************************************       I won’t lie. I struggled with whether or not to post these pictures. After all, you can see the ravages of breast cancer simply by googling it. But those pictures aren’t my genuine experience. Those pictures aren’t me . Certain my pride would keep its secrets, breast cancer force...

October 27th. The day started with anti-nausea medications and four needles of radioactive material injected into my nipple. I didn’t have to wait for surgery. While I was in the pre-op room, the hospital chaplain came to visit me. Strange. There were many other people in the room getting ready for surgery, but he came to my bed like I called him. And left when we were done. (We said a prayer together.) Last thing I remember is my anesthesiologist telling me I was a light w...

<<<<<My FAMILY>>>>>   Tomorrow I go in for a mastectomy, port placement, and immediate reconstruction (if possible, if NOT then an “expander” is placed).  They tell me, odds are less than 5% I could actually die from complications.  I’m “young,” healthy, whatever. Odds are pretty small I could have breast cancer too. These days, I don’t play the odds. That’s...

I was asked to say a few words at my Aunt Shelby’s funeral in September.  She planned the entire event, from the Elvis gospel playing in the background, the suit she wore, the flowers she wanted, the casket, everything.  So I was surprised and happy when my cousin (her only child) asked me to say a few words, read a poem, something.  He knew she was a mother to me in so many ways.  And he never resented the time she spent with me, the home she made for me. In the ...

Here’s a novel idea. You don’t like reading people debate religion? Don’t click on that topic! It always amazes me when people who label themselves fairly “open-minded” get all bent out of shape over a religious debate. Never mind the endless political, technical, social, and entertainment debates that occur here without a peep of protest; nay actual participation , from the offended. Let a group start discussing God, faith, and (oh no!) their opini...

“I had the WEIRDEST dream last night.” Don’t you hate when a friend or family member utters those words? It is usually followed by twenty minutes of "and then(s)" rambling which seems to make perfect sense to them, but not a bit to anyone else. So. I had the weirdest dream last night.  Try to keep up… A friend’s house, (maybe Aunt Jamie’s?), a demon, or demons, haunting the place. I walked from room to room with a cross ...

SERIOUS WOE-IS-ME SNARKINESS AHEAD………..also references to the female anatomy, um, and some cussing….so if that offends, you might wanna skip this……   -------------------------------- For someone who is all about rabid quality of life and not quantity, a woman doesn’t “survive” breast cancer. She may get a reprieve, but eventually, one way or another it gets her; in whole, or in bite size pieces. Today I took Ga...